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BITE user comments - metalize_that

Comments by metalize_that

The Hammers, East Ham

Still trying to get into this firm, really difficult almost as difficult as slipping into a medium sized cashmere jumper. I thought I would do some research on this place, so I hired that green street on DVD. Two hours in and im well confused I could not work out why a giant shine wad grabbing Tom hanks' groin and sucking out a bladder infection. How was this connected with west ham. At first i thought it was the life story of 'Cass'
What a plonker I am! I hired out green mile by mistake.
Back to the drawing board.

1 Feb 2011 18:02

The Crown Hotel, Chertsey

have to lie low in here for a few weeks, a bit annoyed that Ewar Woowar caught me in the act at the vine, especially cos I thought he was dead, left my mini hubble at scene. ive ordered a second hand one from ebay, im not bothered, i'll order a hundred more if i have to, got to spy me some skin!(kushty) after all as I say to my mates at Upton Park.

"I'm forever buying hubbles"

19 Jan 2011 16:05

The Hammers, East Ham

Hello, can anyone tell me how I can join the firm please, asked to see a yeti about an application form and got laughed out of the place, please reconsider, I can being a pillow case if you supply me with the door knobs.

14 Jan 2011 14:47

The Vine Inn, Chertsey

Luckily this place is still closed, told the trouble and strife that I was going to watch the planets align with my mini Hubble out down the meads. Think she bought it, made sure noone was looking, broke in the back doors of the Vine. Bit of trouble getting the Hubble up the stairs, kept getting my cashmere sweater stuck on banister, still smells of
Draught cola and feint smell of leather and sweat, no doubt from the line dancing that used to go on here. After setting up mini Hubble I checked windows of abbey chase nursing home, plenty of lovelies walking around, some of them so old they forget to get dressed at all. Triffic! Kushty! Popped on my iPod, selected the the theme from the lloyds bank ad... Mines a hand shandy barman!
Ultimate lock in!
Perfick!

14 Jan 2011 13:07

The Castle, Chertsey

Found this pub using my mini Hubble, I could see from my flat that there cashew nuts are well out of date. Went there to try out there badger's specked finger, went down nice with the pint of bells I had in my raincoat. I noticed they had an illegal satellite hook up, so straight on the phone to 'Welcome': came down in a flash with his mob to shut down the premises, although he made sure he got a round out of me first.

Not that fussed, it's back to my mini Hubble... Mrs jones is coming back from work about now, only has thin net curtains, Perfick

11 Jan 2011 15:51

The Victory, Chertsey

Monumentally bad pub, full of some right nutters, one of the locals looks like that Ringo chap from NEVER THE TWAIN, guy who works for me goes in their at lunch, always stinks of ale and Toms when he comes back, christ on a bike, their drinks are well suspect, rather drink out of bells embergs furry cup. Awful

10 Jan 2011 18:33

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