The Star, Gillingham

OK for those of you clever enough to read between the lines, here comes a somewhat biased (although fair I thnk youll agree) review of what I consider to be one of the better pubs in the area.

First off - yes in the recent past there may have been some hiccups when it comes to acceptable dress codes etc and for this (despite it being before my time) I humbly apologise. Im fairly sure the staff have not worn polo shirts at any point during their careers in this pub though since it most definitely is NOT a *insert derogatory statement here relating to a pub chain you have heard of - i choose Wetherspoons*.

Dress Code explained -
1 - if you are a labourer or plasterer etc, please kindly wipe your shoes on the mats provided before you come in, Its just common decency.
2 - no baseball caps indoors. We tend not to suffer from blinding sunlight what with having a roof. We are also not located in downtown LA so you just look ridiculous keeping it on. Security issues folks - we like to SEE who comes in our pubs. As do post offices, most other pubs etc...
3 - no tracksuits or sportswear after 6pm on a Friday or Saturday. Its no longer the 80s and judging from most of the people I see dressed like this you clearly do not jog at any point during your day.

OK. Onto a couple of iffy points. Sometimes the food can be a little variable. 9/10 times this is due to a supplier issue (e.g not being able to deliver flat mushrooms and so replacing them with button ones without asking us. Grr) Once again - something I can only apologise for. Food always goes out hot (at 75 degrees or more by law) and to the best of our abilities within a timely fashion.
I agree that sometimes there is an air of menace about the place - but can you genuinely claim you have been somewhere that HASNT?

Friday nights are awesome - kind of an instrumental karaoke where you can put your name down to play or sing songs with a local professional band. So far, nobody has murdered "My Way" or tried to strain out a Meatloaf number so this all has to be plus points over establishments clearly in the grips of recession who resort to regular karaoke. Hint - karaoke is NEVER the answer!!
Saturday nights have a different band(s) playing from around 9 til 12. If the band are particularly good (Strange Desire spring to mind) then we will undoubtedly be asking them back in the very near future for you.

Now, onto the important part; prices!
Double Vodka and a WHOLE can of red bull - �3.75.
A bottle of quality (not Lidl own brand) champagne for under �20
2 cocktails for �6.50
A list of spirits, whiskeys, shooters and licqeurs as long as this review - most of them on some special offer or another,

What more do you people want? The moon on a stick?

No sports are shown here. So if you are more of a sociable person who wants to have conversations with friends and family, enjoy a quiet night out during the week or some livelier than most entertainments during the night then this is for you.
If you get annoyed at the fact that you cant sit in the same chair, drinking the same drink, moaning to the same people about the same thing every day at the same time and wondering "why wont they show Doncaster vs Maidstone part time welders - its the decider as to who will go 9th in the table!" - move along. These arent the droids you are looking for.

Well. As my cramped and facetious fingers draw to a close on this review let me finish by saying we also have an awesome quiz night every tuesday with cash prizes and here is a list of pubs to avoid at all costs for fear of catching hepatitis or eye cancer just by looking at them

Tap N Tin - seriously. Your'e a pub. Get over yourselves!
The Old Ash Tree - unless you are known by people as Bermondsey Dave
The Old Post Office - old being the operative word there

end.

15 Jan 2009 16:44