The Railway, Pitsea

Old (flaccid) member - you surely have been watching too many tv programmes mate, sounds like a script from Eastenders!

Quite on the contrary dear boy, the railway Pitsea is a highly civilised drinker, full of articulate and erudite clientele. Once I even saw a regular lay down his coat for a lady to walk through a (piss) puddle in the centre of the bar.

See you's all down there for sherbet soon, gertcha!!

7 Oct 2005 19:45

Golden Lion, Soho

One winters night - heavily incapacitated by the merciless Madmoiselle Artois and wearing a brand new pair of shoes with smooth leather soles that rendered the pavement like an ice rink - I literally slipped and slid through the doors of this pub, supported by a few of my bosom coves.

I remember it as being very dark, slightly fuggy and sticky underfoot, which was a bonus as it allowed me to stay upright long enough to clap eyes on the delightful young Finnish lady who was to become the apple of my eye, the object of my affections, the Mr Kipling cake of my confectionary dreams.

Here it was that I fell in love with this delightful lady, serenaded by a soundtrack of Madness, The Jam the Stone roses etc, emitting from the quite magnificently appointed jukebox.

Alas, now she is but a figment of past times, lost like overspill in the drip tray of love, consumed like ash on the pub carpet of life.

The Golden Lion is still there though, and worth a look for the menagerie of foreign totty, and the life affirming jukebox.

22 Jan 2005 15:59

Moon On The Square, Basildon

Re. the surely scandalous comments of 'Muffindamule' -
Well la - di - da and 'ark at her

Muffin - you muggy snob and downright poltroon, apart from that you liked it then?

Next time you pop by for a Pimms, be sure and let the chaps know you are in town, one of the oiks will see if he can't arrange a nice 'Criminal Injury' for you to take home as a souvenir of your stay on what we like to think is the Jewel of the 'Essex Riviera'.

Oh and please bring any spare shekels and alms for the poor with you mister, for we be do as you likey good for nothing types without two ha'pennies to rub between our dirty 'ands nor the sense with what to spend 'em with down here.

Ta very much cocker.

A market Trader, Basildon, Essex Riviera

13 Jan 2005 22:45