Ivory Peg, Chelmsford

It was Tom Paine, I think, who said "The English will fight to the death for the right to have no rights" Jay.

21 Feb 2024 16:00

The Old White Beare, Halifax

Well, dear hearts, a Moment Of Truth - not a common thing in life - presented itself to us in this pub recently.

Did you ever wonder, exactly, and I mean exactly, what the term "dog friendly" can mean? If so, then I'll detain - but I hope not belabour you - with an example.

It seems that in this pub, some dog owners take it to mean that every single customer must be, or, importantly, if not then pretend to be, as dog-soft-in-the-head as they are, and they will encourage their animal to" investigate" each and every one in the room to ascertain whether they are indeed all complying with this imagined requirement.

If you really don't like this, and should dare to express your feelings straightforwardly at this assault-by-animal-proxy, and at having your personal space invaded by the critter and - worse still - by its owner, then you can expect to be subjected to a hailstorm of foul-mouthed abuse, aggressively lurched towards and generally turned into a public Aunt Sally. In turn, if you should express any objection to your treatment in appropriate terms, then the persistently head-scratching "manageress" of blonde artificial extensions may well ask you to leave for "causing trouble for no reason".

People may sometimes ask why so many pubs are closing down. I humbly proffer that the truth revealed here is a ten-times-greater reason for that sad fact than the smoking ban ever was or will be.

29 Nov 2023 09:24

The Pear Tree, Norwood Green

(That's <i>return tray</i> in WhatPub language.)

29 Nov 2023 09:06