The White Hart, Holborn

Officially the 'oldest licensed premises in London', as it says outside on an antiquated blackboard. Yet upon entrance it's recently been done up and is so refreshingly modern even Michael J Fox would be impressed. The 'all girl' bar staff has been compromised by a new male manager with a box beard and peculiarly small hands I noticed as he was pouring my seventh pint of Hoegaarden. The urinals came fitted with pipes which took my watery booze-filled piss into the sewers, which was a novelty for me having spent my earlier evening in the yellow paddling pool known as Brown Sugar. The cubicles had no paper though, so it's a good job ASDA was sold out of Brussell Sprouts the night before. Top bant.

4 Feb 2010 17:02

The Hollybush, Loughton

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26 Jul 2007 14:38

The Dublin Castle, Camden

My ex boyfriend Peter got punched here by one of the bouncers after refusing to "buck his f**king ideas up". Completely unacceptable. The only good thing here is Becks on tap and lush toilet paper.

26 Jul 2007 14:33