BITE user comments - xyrion
Comments by xyrion
More like an open prison/cr�che for the socially feeble than a pub or restaurant. Loud, warm, sticky and thoroughly charmless - think Vanessa Feltz after a gym session.
Caveat edax.
26 Nov 2010 15:54
The Artillery Arms, Old Street
Nice Fuller's pub to escape the charmless glass-and-steel wine bars that dominate the area.
Was there in July and found a plastic bag containing a copy of Razzle, a tin of corned beer and what I assume was a monkey's placenta in clingfilm.
26 Nov 2010 15:33
Went for a pint here on Saturday after a stroll in Borough Market, only to get refused entry at the gates because I had a pot of olives in my bag. It was 2 in the afternoon and I was sober as a nun, so I assumed the bouncer was pulling my leg. It didn't take long to realise that levity was not a failing of this power-tripping fool, and we were promptly sent on our way. If this is where drinking in London is headed I'm going back on the crack.
18 Jun 2008 10:22
The Hole In The Wall, Waterloo
Had a truly offensive time in this toxic dump last night. The place wreaks like a geriatric's locker room, the entire length of the bar is crusted with intransigent barrow-boys hell-bent on using their beer-bloated frames to prevent you from getting near enough to order, and the bar staff were happy to serve a Doom Bar that had gone so bad even Oliver Reed would have sent back. The decor put me in mind of an early 1980's working man's club in an abandoned pit town, only without the cheer. Avoid.
18 Jun 2008 10:09
Simply excellent. Enough gaudy royal memorabilia for every Daily Mail reader in suburbia and signed mugshots of celebrities that disappeared into obscurity when men still wore perms. The beer is average at best, the food is unexceptional Thai, but the place is top-drawer charm. Visit little but often for the best effect.
6 May 2008 13:58
The Duke Of Wellington, Marylebone
I wanted to hate this new gastropub because it replaced a corking little boozer that dripped character from every creaky pore. The transformation antique to gastro-chic has been accomplished with the standard asylum white-washing of the walls and removal of decorative trinkets. The place has been culturally sterilised and the charm is gone.
However, the food is great. I was dragged there by a "food-loving" friend of mine and had some bisque and cottage pie. Both were excellent. Even the bread on the side was cooked fresh and tasted great.
Long the lunch, short the evening pint.
6 May 2008 13:37
The Bunch Of Grapes, Knightsbridge
I've been mugged by nicer people than the prize goons loitering behind the bar in this turd hole. Woe betide the hapless punter who expects to get served in the half hour leading up to closing. If you can't walk 2 minutes round the corner to the Beauchamp, get a can of Special from Lords next door, park yourself outside the Grapes and warn all potential customers of the horror that lurks within.
Offensive beyond comprarison.
14 Sep 2007 17:29
The Tattersalls Tavern, Knightsbridge
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walked into a pub. They left immediately. It was Tattersalls.
Dreadful beyond metaphors.
14 Sep 2007 17:11
Sit yourself down outside and enjoy the rich tapestry of London life that hastes by. Say hello to some of the strangers. Have several jars, stumble into the British Museum, take the middle left door in Great Court and bathe in the awesome presence of the Rosetta Stone. Take yourself back to the pub. Be sure to donate on the way.
A tourist trap with character. Perfectly acceptable.
14 Sep 2007 17:04
The Jack Horner, Tottenham Court Road
If Jack Horner was smelly, dull, slow and unwelcoming then this place has lives up to the name admirably. Every drinks taste bitter when bought from these clowns.
14 Sep 2007 16:39
Slug and Lettuce, Canary Wharf
I once met a guy called Kev. He was about 40, worked on oil rigs and got lots of time off. His hobbies included football, chess and drinking. He told me all about the great pubs in Greenock, his home town. He was a fat chap with a heart of gold.
This is a toss pub.
14 Sep 2007 16:28
Observe the countless staff endlessly carrying glasses from one end of the bar to the other. Ponder why the only person serving seems completely unfamiliar with the names of the various beers they threaten to sell. Belch, exhale, leave.
14 Sep 2007 16:23
The Curtain's Up, West Kensington
Big and comfy, but stinks like a festival urinal in a heatwave. A Guinness will cost you �3.02 - useful if you want a pocket full of shrapnel.
14 Sep 2007 16:11
Loud. Cramped. Smelly. Overpriced. Rude, idle bar staff. Avoid at all costs.
26 Mar 2007 18:19
The only honest pub in the Wharf. Friendly John the landlord will sell you beer and provide a comfortable environment in which to drink it. There's no loud music. You can find a seat. The beer is well-priced. You can chat without shouting. A classic.
PS: Their cash register looks like a Babbage original - cash only here.
23 Mar 2007 17:12
The Seven Stars, Chancery Lane
The best pub in town. Terrific food from a varied menu, good guest beers, great landlady and staff, and a sartorially savvy cat. Watch out for the treachourous ascent to the bogs.
23 Mar 2007 16:51
The Thornbury Castle, Marylebone
Awesome food and super-friendly staff. Worth a visit. Decor is a bit dated, but not in a good way.
23 Mar 2007 16:44
The Carpenters Arms, Marble Arch
The Dog and Pipe - as it's called by those in the know - is really two pubs in one. On occasion it's The Great Dog and Pipe, with a good selection of ales, some tasty looking barmaids and client�le who exude cleanliness and education. Unfortunately on the other occasions it's The Dog and Poo, a dreary early 80's pit-town boozer where all the splendid ales have turned because the betracksuited customers have shunned real beer for some continental lager folly. Worth a visit for the former - pays your money, takes your choice.
26 Nov 2010 16:12