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Hoochimama's Bar Bistro, Tooting

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user reviews of Hoochimama's Bar Bistro, Tooting

please note - reviews on this site are purely the opinion of site visitors, so don't take them too seriously.

onehunglow - 10 Sep 2008 14:16
yep closed down by the baliffs.
beerinspector - 17 Aug 2008 21:25
Yup. Hoochie Mamma's has been shut for a month or more. There's a letter in the window, from the landlord's agents, reclaiming the property and giving the guys who ran it a date to pick up the furniture/booze/etc.

Shame. Although there's no "normal" beer there and could get a bit loud at times it was a nice option to have in Tooting.

Interesting that both Spirit and Hoochies have closed in the recent past. Suspect Tooting Tram & Social might be part of it.
mydogminton - 14 Aug 2008 14:24
looks very shut to me - has it gone out of business?
Upferret - 13 Aug 2008 23:25
Was in here the other day,talk about needing redecoration this place has seen better days.still wont go into this place at night. no beer on tap only bottles,what is going on here
onehunglow - 8 Aug 2008 21:13
I heard this pub is run by black people! I love black people! So much atmosphere and rap music. Bravo!
BukkiOriola - 11 Jul 2008 01:00
Its obvious that a few of these comments are untrue - one of the best things about this bar is the food and I've seen the owner throw out people who try to deal. Not ideal viewing when you're taking your Nan to your local(!)but we were glad that someone is taking action. Most pubs around Tooting dont
thornbird - 18 May 2008 22:57
Well I'm going to have to disagree with the previous posts...

I have a few drinks in here every couple of weeks and often some food and have never had a bad experience! Okay, admittedly you're never quite sure which beer they're actually gonna have on tap - but otherwise the atmosphere is relaxed, the people are friendly and the crepes etc. are slightly different to your normal pub fare! It's certainly never been intimidating!

Good if you want a relaxed drink.

Bad if expect a trying-to-be-a-gourmet pub atmosphere.
randommalarky - 8 May 2008 16:00
I think the last poster meant grammar. Never mind.

This place can be a bit intimidating when 3 or 4 regulars who are mates decide to 'large it' and inflict their invective & world views on the rest of the place. It's a pub for all to drink in - not their exclusive club.

Doesn't happen all the time but fairly often.

Reaction you get from staff is a wee bit of a lottery to be honest. From the friendly to the hacked off that you've interrupted their nail-polishing time.

Nice when not busy for a quick cheeky couple.
WheelieBin - 7 May 2008 15:57
Went here last night, What a tip barstaff gormless.
Didn't order food,but saw people complaining about slow service.
All beers off,only expensive bottled beers in stock.

Save money goto Wetherspoons,same clientele. drunk losers.
Could be a good bar if was redecorated and new bar staff and had beer in stock.
not too mauch to ask is it?
onehunglow - 1 May 2008 16:17
Been a couple of times before and has been ok. Definitely gone downhill though. Left after bar man refused to close the door (despite several people saying too cold) and calling member of our group a 'tos**er'. To be fair the asst manager asked us to stay, offered free drinks and explained that barman is a bit odd and can sometimes be off hand - damage done though. Seemed odd to employ someone who has habit of insulting customers.

And had ran out of lager too.

Found a couple of places towards Colliers Wood and Selkirk not far away.
boff - 28 Apr 2008 15:12
nice small bar near to the tube - problem is.. its so small its full with 25 people so avoid if you in a group!

nice vibe tho and a good patch to watch the world go bye. I Didnt order food but the service was fine if a bit relaxed... but then its not a chain so that is waht i would expect !

quirky45 - 25 Apr 2008 12:56
Went in here for a bite to eat. To be honest was incredibly disappointed. The waiter took a lifetime to come over and even though we offered to go to the bar and order, he said 'sit down i'll be there in 30 seconds'. 10 mins later he arrived even though there were only about 7 other customers and 40 mins later our food arrived (the order was wrong but we ate it anyway as we were bloody hungry) My mum asked for some salt as she couldn't find any around the bar or other tables. waiter bought the salt over as my mum was practically finished(i noticed he was busy talking on his mobile phone). Bar was a mess, looked like there was a total lake of organization.
noggintnog - 17 Apr 2008 14:25
Good bar, Gus -nice guy-when there.

several nice babes
Brewerytech - 9 Feb 2008 22:57
Loved the place. I went there last night and met a couple of hunky guys. We chatted til late whilst glugging great beer. A flea swatter's paradise. Recommended!
JApple - 11 Jan 2008 11:29
Quite a cool bar.
Often several cute ladies drink here.

Some of the barstaff are fine as well.

Fantastic Pizza.MMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmm.
pubtaster - 10 Dec 2007 19:56
FYI this isnt Gus. He (unlike other bar owners here) isnt sad enough to review his own bar.

I am a regular and love the place. It clearly just isnt for you.

Cheekage - 30 Oct 2007 15:10
yes gus , Totally vibeless. No i didnt go in til last orders on a sunday

i tried it out thurs at about 8 and sat the same time. And it WAS vibeless !!

anonymous - 18 Oct 2007 10:02
Vibeless?!?! What?!?! Did you catch it in the 5 minutes it is a bit quiet of a Sunday evening?

Hoochies is a friendly, sociable, relaxing bar where you always meet new people and can be assured of fantastic food.

There is always someone you know and the staff are top people. Never had a disappointing visit and I go there almost every day even if just to pop in and say hi to the friendly faces.

You think this classy bar is vibeless but you like the Colliers Tup...hmmmmmmmm! Nuff said really!
Cheekage - 10 Jul 2007 15:50
petey.p - 3 Jul 2007 16:20
This is NOT a pub, but a bar. Interesting selection of foreign lagers on the bar - a shame they normally only have one or two available.

Pizza's great, and reasonable value - but food service can be very, very slow.

Friendly staff, when they're not chatting to their mates
bristolbeerboy - 2 Apr 2007 14:11
Went in with a mate for food at 4.45pm, ordered food at 4.55pm. Kitchen opens at 5pm. Food arrives 5.40pm. How the f*ck does that work????? We were pretty much the only people in there. Now I know why. Ended up having to take my grub away and eat on the tube. Not very happy. Please someone buy this bar and save us from this madness!
monkeyboysupreme - 24 Feb 2007 12:05
Great pub.. lovely pizza - seriously overpriced drink!! Bit of advice need to stick to a price list -One night, in a round of 7, each of us got charged a different price for the exact same drinks, sometimes with a difference of £3??? Staff add up in their heads and seem to charge what they like??

Really good pub - but the above put me off and i havnt been back since? 7 good drinkers lost!!!!!!!!!!
cheekyone - 7 Jan 2007 17:30
We have been regulars here since Hoochi's opened, and while it does have it's ups and downs service-wise it's a great little bar! Every time we come in, we end up chatting to randoms and making friends. It's a very sociable, safe, friendly bar which is full of local atmosphere. Definitely worth a visit, but be flexible with the beers you choose to drink - they frequently run out of draught lager! D'oh! We need more bars like this in Tooting!!
adam74 - 6 Jan 2007 19:32
I have to say that reading some of these comments I am a little surprised. I have lived in Tooting round the corner from Hoochies for 3 years and go at least once a week. The food is faultless and they do actually make the best lasagne (both veggie and meat) in the world - sorry Mum! Pizza is great, salads are fresh and the pancakes are to die for.

The cocktails are unique and the staff are always coming up with new ones. I even named a special one made for Halloween!

Yes it is true that the staff can be a bit slack when distracted by friends who come in but I think the same is true of any bar or pub, it just notices more here cos it is quite small. Anyway that side of things is set to improve.

The bar has a great "Hoochies family" type atmosphere. Went there for New Year and the DJ was great, not too loud and there was space to dance in the back too. Service was fast especially for such a busy night and the staff did a great job. Think regular DJ nights would be great!

Drinks are well priced and overall it is far friendlier and much better value than many places in Tooting.

And I agree with Matildas comments about the owner... ;o)
Cheekage - 4 Jan 2007 14:13
Love this place. Its good for lunch and also evening drinks. Pizza is lovely, staff are laid back, atmosphere is relaxed. Would be good if they had more beers on taps but it won't stop me going there.
anonymous - 6 Dec 2006 13:52
I love the tiled Victorian floor and the traditioinal shop front. This place has a lot of charachter - from the fixtures to the people who work and socialise there.

We enjoyed the Chilean Sauvignon and the Pizza was divine. Then we had a couple of James Boags, the only place in London that sells them?

If you want draught Carling and staff in uniform then avoid!
TJAY - 5 Dec 2006 23:32
stop running out of booze!...simple, no?
propertyking - 11 Sep 2006 17:47
Terrible shame. This used to be a rare Tooting bar with genuine character. Last night the bar staff were drunk and behaving like they didn't want custom. After Body Rockers "I Love The Way You Move" turned up to 11 for the 6th time in a row we moved on. Avoid like the plague
anonymous - 27 Aug 2006 11:15
What a disappointment... I appreciate that the bar has is meant to have a laid back feel but the staff seem less interested in the clientele than chatting with their mates at the bar... plus, the bar is tiny so if you get a few people queuing up it takes forever to get served. Once you have been served by the dis-interested staff and if you are lucky enough to get what you actually want (if they haven't run out) then it's a nice chilled place, and the food is OK. I've been a few times now, each subsequent time with an expectation things will improve... So far not so good.
SilverBullet - 16 Aug 2006 17:46
Excellent place, great atmosphere. Good choice of yummy food and the owner's not bad on the eye either. The cocktails were great and if I lived a bit closer I'd be there several nights a week! I highly recommend it.
Matilda - 12 May 2006 09:05
Not at all what I expected and a great night out.

Friends and colleagues enjoyed the fancy fruit beers - a novelty !
The selection and quality of continental beers available on both on draft and in bottles was very good.

The waiting time for food to be served was minimal - very impressive !

A night to remember - we will be back !!
Lilywhitelahiri - 26 Apr 2006 22:51
Great little bar, seems to be run for love not money. Reminds me a bit of bars you get in Paris.
Great range of continental lagers on tap and in bottles, luck of the draw who makes your cocktails though.
One problem is the ventilation; there is none, so the only way to draw the smoke out of the pub is to have the door open, so it is either too smokey or too cold!
propertyking - 26 Apr 2006 16:03
Service has improved of late, as has food quality. Just a pity there are so many tap beers run out at any one time!
rjbradburnesq - 20 Apr 2006 10:32
When it was suggested that we meet here last Saturday night, I was initially sceptical as I'm a beer rather than a cocktails fan, and was expecting chrome and black furniture......but I was very pleasantly surprised.

The place had a very chilled out feel to it and served an excellent (fresh) pint of Guinness. Also the food coming out of the kitchen tempted me into ordering one of their pizzas, which was really tasty.

A great evening had by all, so much so that our plans went out the window and we ended up staying for the whole evening !

DannyMc - 18 Apr 2006 11:56
Tooting is still crying out for some decent nightspots. Hoochie Mama's goes some way to redress that.
But the service is terrible, whether you're waiting at the bar or you've ordered food. I suppose I've not been in for a few months though, it could have improved...
Jamiebgoode - 15 Apr 2006 19:31
Friendly staff, best cocktails in the south, wicked food. Service has definitely got better
anonymous - 15 Apr 2006 16:02
Was never a beer drinker before I started going to Hoochie's, but was converted after trying their great selection of fruit beer. Great for a girlie night out, staff were fab and did'nt wait long for the fab food. Definitely recommend!!
anonymous - 15 Apr 2006 15:57
Management need to pull their fingers out and hire some experienced, enthusiastic staff for this place. It could be a really great, quirky local bar, but the service seriously lets it down.
tootingbabe - 20 Feb 2006 10:53
When you arrive at a bar at six, and two of your party are still waiting for their food at half eight you know there’s a problem…

Service chaotic and unapologetic, food was nice when it arrived, but frankly we were so hungry I think the furniture would have tasted good by that point.

I really want to like this bar, but last night just took the biscuit. The service has always been terrible (bar staff chatting while you wait to be served, staff attempting to open a bottle wine as if they’ve never seen a corkscrew before), but I’ve tried to write it off as “character”.

Last night went beyond that – truly awful service. I’d still pop in for a drink but I’d never bring anyone here for food ever again. Sad really – it could be a really nice little bar, but the staff/management clearly haven’t got a clue.

JohnnyAdnams - 19 Feb 2006 12:46
What can I say, lazy arrogant staff, clearly no management present, if you want a good drink avoid this place, smoke is pretty good in tooting bec.
anonymous - 14 Feb 2006 19:20
There are far worse places to drink in Tooting Broadway. Pro's: cheap magners cider, cheap cocktails, close to Broadway tube. Con's: incompetent lazy staff, bad furniture, and too smokey. Overall 5/10, if its a quick beer you're after its worth popping in, but if you're after food and decent drinking session give it a miss.
Dr.T - 9 Dec 2005 12:42
More of a very small bar (that serves some very good pizza) than a bistro, but that's meant in a bad way - it's a great little place. It was worryingly empty when it forst opened a year or so ago, but now it's normally fairly lively (in a relaxed way) and looks set to stay.

There's a good range of premium beers, both on tap and bottled, and the staff are excellent - friendly, helpful and attentive. It's also open until midnight most of the time (maybe every night?) which always helps!

My only criticisms would be that it could be a bit too smokey for some (it is small) and you can sometimes feel a little "on show" if you're sat in the big front windows.

All in all it's a great little place.

mydogminton - 8 Nov 2005 11:18
Nice chilled bar, worth a visit, can get some poncey clientelle, but the staff are friendly, good beers - shame it isn't bigger.
Flawed - 20 Sep 2005 14:47
Hoochie Cooochie pudding and pie. Come here for GR8 beer (e.g. Budvar on tap), wine and excellent value/tasty food. This place is cooooool and so are the staff. If ypu want to watch the footy, head to Spirit bar down the road, which is a bit of alright too.
garthmcw - 18 Mar 2005 12:28
Full of drunken yuppies who spill out onto the street when it gets too full, go to JJ Moons instead for a better class of drinker.
fatshirt - 18 Jan 2005 08:06
We've been going to this bar ever since it opened early 2004. The owner (Gus) is delightful and all the bar staff are friendly and efficient. The range of beers (both bottled and draught) and cocktails will leave you speachless, and the pancakes/pizzas are delicious and very reasonably priced. The atmosphere is chilled, and the music is played at just the right volume. This beats the Spirit bar pants-down for service and a warm and friendly atmos. Oh - and it has a 12am licence. Definitely worth a visit!
Adam - 16 Nov 2004 11:34
This place is great. I am only speaking on behalf of the drinkers mind you. Have never actualy eaten in there The selction of continental draught and bottled lagers is exceptional and the late restraunters lisence is great for a weeknight out. No problem with size either and Im big
Tom - 11 Oct 2004 12:50
Friendly, chilled atmosphere. Thought the size made it a bit more cosy (esp the dimmed alcoves) Pizza's were excellent. Would def recommend as the huge beer and wine list will keep you happy for a while
thornbird - 12 Sep 2004 21:59
I've been to Hoochimama's a few times (in the evening, I must add) and despite the lack of air-conditioning, the pizzas are great and the service is friendly...The lack of space does pose a problem, but myself and my friends will be returning -probably tomorrow!
Adi - 2 Sep 2004 01:35
Tables required yoga-like flexibility to sit at, the barman was friendly and helpful but the lunch that was meant to be 20 minutes actually took 1 1/2 hours to arrive - and was only salad!!!! Do not eat here at lunchtime, you will be let down.
hannah - 30 Jul 2004 11:56
Although a nice bar with an enthusiastic barman, the service on a Tuesday lunchtime was awful. We waited an hour and a half for our food, and we had only ordered salad! Wouldn't recommend eating here if you are in any sort of hurry.
JUlie - 30 Jul 2004 11:52
nice little place. Very friendly staff, and a generally decent place to have a couple of drinks. Excellent pizzas as well.

Only downside is its quite hard to get a seat on busy nights as it is so small
Seb - 7 Jul 2004 17:37

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